As usual, everyone wakes up groaning when Coach starts playing his trumpet. This time it is "Cavalry Charge".
Mark, Rod, Leo, Shawn and Billy, who could pass for Mark's younger brother except the Jamaican accent makes it obvious they aren't related, bolt from the cabin at a dead run.
Mark tilts his head toward Billy and says, "Billy, you go get Coach, we'll take care of the rest."
"Sure thing, Mon," he says, not breaking stride. He heads off in the direction of the manager's cabin.
Rod nearly trips when he looks at Mark and asks, "You really sure this is a good idea?"
"Do we want Mo's reign of terror to end? Then what better way to lure him in than this?"
"I know, but Sam and Eric don't really seem like the 'team player' types. Except with each other."
"Relax. I think I can persuade them."
Soon they arrive at the Yellow cabins, where most of the occupants are lounging around. One pair of particularly muscled guys are wrestling, without their shirts. Another is holding up a punching bag, while the other is hitting it. Rod notices that, hanging over the door of number one, is a skull, clearly fake, but intimidating nonetheless.
Mark jogs up the stairs to the door of Yellow cabin one, bangs on it and says, "Hey Jozer!"
While they wait, Leo asks, "Jozer?"
Mark replies, "That's his nick-name."
"Who?"
"Joe."
"Why is he called that?"
"Cause it sounds like 'dozer."
Leo gulps and says, "L-Like in b-b-bulldozer?"
The door is opened by a seventeen year-old guy with a really good tan, spiky orange hair, is about six and a half feet tall and weighs three hundred pounds! Most of it muscle, the rest, a force you don't want to be in the way of! Joe Spivey, leader of the Yellow cabins, wearing pitch-black combat boots, jeans, half-finger leather gloves, a golden barbed chain necklace and a sleeveless denim vest, over a yellow t-shirt.
"What do you want? I'm kinda in the middle of something and this is the fifth time I've been interrupted," Joe says in an exasperated tone, with a voice so deep, you'd think a tuba was talking.
Inside, Mark sees a row of chairs occupied by more muscle-bound Yellow cabiners, writing in notepads. In front of them, is a kid with an agonized look on his face, tucking his underwear back into his pants. On the wall, is a marker-board that reads, "Today's lesson: Proper wedgie technique."
Mark looks up at the skull, and asks in a sarcastic tone, "Is that one of your recent victims?"
Voice rolling like thunder, Joe replies, "The only victim involved with that was my thumb. Stupid hammer. Now what is it you want?!"
"We need to borrow the twins." Mark says.
"Fine."
"Great... Wait! What?"
"Fine."
"Your two best troublemakers, and you're gonna... let us have them? Just like that?"
"Yeah, they've been getting on my nerves all day!"
"Um... ookay."
"Sam! Eric! Get out here!"
In unison, the two of them rush over from their bunks wearing rather amused grins, salute, and say, "Sir, yes Sir!"
Joe scowls at them, their stances become more rigid, at attention, and their smiles melt away. Joe then proceeds to push them out the door and say, "Mark's in charge of you 'til he says so. Now go!"
The door slams behind them with a resounding bang and they turn around to face Mark, Rod, Leo and Shawn, who's been distractedly watching the sky for the last few minutes as if it were going to drop on him.
After they all walk down the stairs and away from the front of the cabin to let people through, the twins cross their arms and glower at them. Sam starts, "Why should we do..."
"...anything you tell us to?" Eric finishes.
Mark pulls out a wad of camobucks, and a greedy, mischievous light enters their eyes, and Mark says, "Ten cams' for each of you."
"What exactly do you..."
"...want us to do?" They say in a non-convinced, hesitant manner.
"You two are the MOST annoying people we know and you're going to help us trick Mo into blabbing the truth, right where Coach can hear."
Sam, "Oh no, no..."
Eric, "...there's no way you..."
Both, "...are going to rope us into this!"
Mark snaps his fingers, and Shawn, who seemed to have disappeared while they were talking, shoves his way between the twins, walks up to Mark, and hands him a journal he had hidden under his shirt.
Mark holds it up so the pranksters can see it and their eyes nearly pop out of their heads.
"I'm sure Maggie would like to know how you guys managed to replace the helium in the balloons at her tenth birthday party with 'sulphur hexafluoride."
Mark flips the page and says, "Or then there's the time you..."
Mark reads ahead and after a moment, grimaces, "...put itching powder on the shoulder straps of her bikini?! That was you?!"
They flinch, get down on their knees and start begging him to spare them, so pale with terror that one could see the freckles on their identical "pretty-boy" faces, from fifty feet away.
"We'll do anything you ask!" Sam says.
"Anything?" Mark asks.
"Anything!" Eric says.
"Well then, Waldorf and Statler, you're going to..."
"I can't believe we're doing this!" Eric complains as they're headed toward the Blue cabins.
"That's what happens when you promise them, 'anything'!"
"You said 'anything' first!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"DID NOT!"
"DID TOO!"
Suddenly, Eric notices movement in the trees behind his brother and looses a startled yelp. Sam spins around and asks, "What did you see?"
"I dunno!"
Sam sighs, looks over his shoulder at his twin and says, "Brain damage!"
Sam looks back at the trees, and after a few moments they both jump, when they see something move somewhere deeper in than before. They look at each other, then at the forest, then at each other again. Finally, they both go charging into the undergrowth to investigate.
Whoever or whatever it is they're chasing is fast enough that all they see of it are just brief glances ahead of them, enough that they can still follow it, but not enough to see who or what it is. They end up hopping the fence to continue pursuit, but eventually they lose the mysterious figure all-together. The two of them continue to wander around, to see if they can spot it again, and finally give up when they reach some random clearing in front of a small cliff-side in the woods. As they head away from the clearing, back under the trees, they hear a twig snap and Eric turns around, looks up and points. Sam looks, standing at the top of the cliff looking over the edge, is the shadowy figure of a man.
The mysterious stranger doesn't seem to notice their presence, he turns and bends over to lift something. When the stranger turns around, he bends over again to set down a large object, and tips it over. They realize that the object is a metal barrel, which starts emptying itself of its contents. Some weird blue gunk lands in a pool of water in the clearing. Over the course of the next several minutes, the man dumps two more barrels out. The second had some red slime in it and the third had some gelatin-like purple stuff. After that, the stranger uses one hand to dump out three bottles of some greenish stuff too, and then disappears.
They walk to the edge of the pool and look in. The "water" seems to be boiling and looks like some trippy sixties rainbow effect, which is in stark contrast with the half-melted old tire, the beer bottles, the toilet-seat and the dead animals.
As they're walking away, Sam says, "Are you thinking what I'm think..." (SMACK) something thrusts out of the ground in front of his feet and slaps him in the face, cutting him off, mid-sentence.
"AAAUUGH! MY NOSE!" He says clutching his face and recoiling in pain.
They both scream like little girls and run a hundred yards away from the pool and the discolored ground around it, before they feel safe. Sam's nose is bleeding and has a large bruise forming.
When they catch their breath, Eric says, "Yes, Sam. I was thinking what you were thinking. We never speak of this again."
"Agreed."
Meanwhile. Billy sees the manager's cabin ahead and picks up the pace. He throws the door open and sweeps his gaze over the room and spots Coach.
"Coach-Mon, there's something you need to see! Quick! Come on!"
"Billy, what is it? Why the rush?"
"No time for questions. Hurry!"
"Alright, alright. I'm comin', relax," Coach says, getting up from his chair.
They jog out the door, then toward a point halfway between the Red and Blue cabins.
Before they reach their destination though, Coach has to take a break, "I haven't done this much running since 'Nam. No wait, I wasn't in 'Nam."
"We have to hurry!"
"Okay, Billy, okay. Just give me four minutes."
"Ugh."
Mark shifts his feet impatiently, soon Coach would be here. Coach would hide behind a bush and when Mo comes tearing around the trees in such a foul mood that when Mark starts chastising him, he'll blab til' the cows come home.
All of a sudden, he can hear Mo shouting after Sam and Eric.
"No! They're not supposed to be here yet! What's taking Coach so long?!" Mark mutters angrily to himself.
The twins come racing around the bend, terrified looks on their faces, with Mo not far behind, going berserk with a "Beehive" rapid-fire acorn gun!
Sam and Eric run past him and keep going.
"Cowards!" Mark says at their backs then turns to face Mo.
Mo stops in front of Mark and hefts his weapon, saying, "Alright, Colonel Sanders, why were those chickens hassling me?"
"They were supposed to see if you were up to anything," Mark lies.
Mo's eyes flick over Mark's shoulder and quickly back to his face, then he drops his gun on the ground.
"What are you doing?" Mark asks.
Mark picks the gun up and asks, "Seriously, what are you playing at?"
From the bushes nearby, Shawn shouts in an almost perfect impression of Erik Bauersfeld's original performance, "It's a trap!"
"Not right now, Shawn." Mark says.
Mark then points the gun at Mo and asks, "Seriously, what do you want to have happen here? You want me to shoot you with this or something? You think I'm out for revenge? Come on, answer me! Why are you grinning like tha..."
"Mark! Put that down!" Coach says as he walks into the clearing.
"Coach, wait I can explain..."
"I think I've seen enough, Mo get some of your guards and take Mark to my office." Mo immediately starts shouting orders at his nearest henchmen.
The Blue Cabiners come over and restrain Mark, who even as he's dragged off continues trying to convince Coach that he's innocent.
Mo puts a hand on Coaches shoulder and says, "You did what was best Coach, for a long time I've had some suspicions about him. In fact, I just found out that he's made everyone in the Red Cabins into a bunch of low-down dirty crooks, they rob, they bully, and just cause all sorts of havoc behind our backs."
With a shocked and disappointed look on his face, Coach sighs and says, "Until a new leader has been elected, Mo is in charge of the Red cabins." Mo starts leading Coach back to the Manager's Cabin, assuring him that everything would be fine, though Coach still sullenly says, "And I thought Mark was such a good kid."
Mo enters the managers cabin, goes to the back of the main room, through a door, and into the "Jail". In one of the nearest cells, sits Mark.
"Well, well, well... well." Mo says, trying to hide his mirth.
"Is that all you can say? 'Well'?" Mark says with a mildly annoyed face on.
"I... win... again! Ha ha ha ha ha... (sigh)"
"Yes, Mo. You've won again, but like every time before, you've only won a battle."
"And that's supposed to mean something?" snickers Mo.
Mark's hand shoots out and grabs Mo by the shirt, pulling him up against the bars so their faces are inches apart and he says, "It means you may have the battle, but the war is mine!"
"Whatever you say, Mark. Whatever you say." Mo says in a "freaked-out" tone as he leaves.
Mark smiles at the door and says triumphantly, "It's just a matter of time."
